Her family won't accept us as a lesbian couple and we have now split up

DEAR DEIDRE: MY girlfriend broke up with me because her ultimate dream in life is to have a child.

I’m a woman of 38 and she is 29.


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We’ve been together for two years. We became close very quickly and were introduced to one another’s families.

They didn’t know we were a couple and we could never have that talk as both families are devout Muslims and don’t accept gay relationships.

She wants us to stay friends and we both tried so hard to stay close.

But we had a fight and I ended up staying the night with a male friend.

Nothing happened but my ex found out and all hell broke loose.

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She said I must do all the running to make it work.

I’m trying but she keeps shutting me out. I’m heartbroken.

DEIDRE SAYS: It is tough being under this sort of cultural and religious pressure with conflicting loyalties between your needs and the expectations of your families.

You can find support through the Asian Family Counselling Service (asianfamilycounselling.org, 020 8574 0912).

Your ex might feel guilty about breaking up and wants to tell herself you can still be friends – but that is understandably hurtful for you.

It is healthier to let the friendship go. My support pack Moving On will help.

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